Lately a number of clients begin our sessions with, “I think I have depression”. As a licensed psychologist as well as a life strategy coach, I responsibly assess for a mood disorder, but most of the time I tell them, “No, what you are likely experiencing is what I’ve tagged, COVID Mood.
COVID Mood mimics the experience of depression. Like depression, thinking, feelings, body function, and behaviour may all be affected. It is more than quarter-life or mid-life crisis. And, it is often a new mood experience for normally motivated and energetic people.
Common Experiences of COVID Mood
Clients tell me they are tired much of the time and are sleeping more. Yet not waking with their normal energy.
Pleasure and enjoyment in previously enjoyed activities are diminished.
Life is exhausting, even busy, but driven by tasks, time fillers, and need-to-do chores rather than purpose.
They are eating more and less healthily. Many have put on a few pounds. For some, use of substances such as alcohol has increased.
They feel decreased motivation to exercise, to get out of their pajamas or lululemon, or even do their usual basic personal self-care.
The boundary between work and not work is increasingly hard to define and manage. I hear, “Why not complete that piece of work because what else is there to do in the evenings?”. Conversely, I also hear, “I’m just not getting stuff done for work. I could lose my job, but I just can’t get going on this project.” Or, “I’m saying no to new clients and opportunities “. These pronouncements are usually followed by, “this is not like me”.
Some clients experience a constant low buzz of anxiousness. Life is relentlessly examined through a lens of ‘what if’s’ that produce nothing but more of the same.
There is less future vision. Why plan for a vacation? Why take that on-line course? Why? So much free time to learn Italian for that trip and yet hours are spent playing mindless games or watching Netflix.
Connections with friends and family are more sporadic and isolation more of a norm, easier and perhaps more desirable.
Intimate relationships feel a bit stale. One client said, “we are less than a year into our relationship and it feels like we are an old married couple. We sit in front of the tv or on our phones every night.”.
Many are critical of how they feel. “I’m luckier than a lot of people. I have work and I don’t have COVID so what do I have to feel down about?” This is thinking that takes you down.
As I said at the start of this article, COVID Mood mimics depression. Further, the restrictions and limitations of life under COVID are exactly the things advised against if someone is experiencing depression. My clients and I successfully use evidenced based strategies for managing depression to manage COVID Mood.
Beat COVID Mood
Watch Thinking
Structure and Compartmentalize
Set modest Behavioural Goals.
Connect
Inspire
Watch Thinking that Takes You Down
Just naming and becoming aware of COVID Mood as a common experience and understandable reaction to current reality can begin to take the edge off worry, self-criticism and helplessness.
Pay attention to thoughts and thought patterns that take you down or are simply not useful or effective. Practice self-compassion. This is hard stuff to navigate.
Reflect on the successes of your day at the end of it. Set small goals for the next day.
Changes in thinking and mood follow changes in behaviour. Do not wait until you ‘feel like doing something, just do it’
Structure and Compartmentalize
Reset the structure of your life. The particulars won’t be the same but ask, “what activities have previously made up my day?” Get creative and realistic with details.
Compartmentalize. Draw lines between activities. Be vigilant to blurs and breaches in work/life activities. Do not organize your work around a 24 hour shift. Shut down your working from home space, even if it’s your coffee table or kitchen island. Be brutal here. Create a transitional ritual between work and not work, even if it’s a quick walk, a change of clothes.
Practice saying ‘no’ to being on call 24/7.
Find your natural rhythm and exploit it. I do most of my focused creative work very early or very late in the day. What’s your rhythm? Create specific times for activities based on this.
Create healthy meals and make eating an experience not a mindless activity. Share food virtually or otherwise where safe.
Set Modest Behavioural Goals
Commit to self-care routines. Set a small specific goal each day to experience success. Acknowledge each success. Change “bed hair” to “work hair” even if no one will see you. Up-level to a shirt or business top instead of a tee shirt. Get up an hour earlier. Read something motivational for 20 minutes.
Exercise. Every day get outside. Walk to the store. Use stairs. Activate your body.
Get up and go to bed on a routine. Yes, this really is an evidenced based strategy to manage low mood.
Connect
Find every opportunity to experience human connection. Social isolation is depression’s best friend and supporter. Talk to people who serve you. Phone friends and family. Stop texting your way through this. Have Zoom dinners. Or drinks. Or book clubs. We are all heartily sick of remote everything, but it’s the best we can for now. And more than ever critical to our psychological well-being.
Aim to join real time remote classes. Interact. Don’t work out in isolation.
Reach out to support others.
Inspire
Take even 20 minutes each day to learn something or read something inspiring or motivational.
Plan something fun. You can plan your next adventure in detail. With a friend, partner or child.
Write something inspiring.
Bring beauty into your life with all five senses.
Replace solo on-line games and activities with learning and things you can play with another person.
Create a vision board or vision slide show. Inspire yourself with images that are uplifting to you.
Beat COVID Mood. If you are interested in creating a personalized Beat COVID Mood Strategy I’d be delighted to speak with you. Dr. Gail Howell-Jones R. Psych at GHJones.com
**This article is not intended to diagnose or manage depression. If you find your mood getting harder to manage and especially if you experience thoughts of self-harm, contact a health or mental health professional and speak with your family doctor.